Prisoner

You are not alone. I felt this one deeply. Telling yourself and others 'lies' to convince them you are okay so that you can take care of them. All the while you are in this dark place but you turn on the lights for everyone else. Still you cannot see yourself, that there will ever be an end to this suffering. And maybe you sit in a corner breaking the skin some time ago and now you just break the skin in your mind trying to sooth yourself. But knowing what will come tomorrow, knowing what came before too. Still fighting for those you love, but maybe not fighting for yourself anymore because you crossed that line. Looking in the mirror wondering about the reflection. Knowing you will die trying but wondering if you can make it another day. And you are not alone.

I think I've leaned to just live with my depression. I think sometimes people think depression is crying and being sad all the times. For me it's kind of like being numb. Not to say that I don't feel emotions, it's just i deal with them in my own way. Such as poems.

I think this song is somewhat how I feel at times.
https://youtu.be/1fwJ8H5wWCU

Thank you very much friend, for understanding and reading my poetry. 😁