Life’s part 1 repeat.

“You’re being a creep”
What happened…?
How did I fucked this up?
Memories
“You’re such a creep”
Followed by swinging arms
Feet slamming down
Trust was destroyed.
I don’t get it…
I was doing the same thing I’ve seen many others do
“Perception”
Why??
My physical appearance really is the reason I’m not liked
Isn’t it?
Fear
I don’t want this…
memories keep flooding back
“LEAVE ME ALONE”
But they won’t…
The memories just keep coming just won’t stop.
“Hey buddy… hey! Hey! Hey!! Just breathe!”
Bouncing in and out of reality
“Where are we?”
Finally…
The memories are quiet…
“Is the ___ back?”
It’s her…
The memories come flooding back
It’s cold
It’s hot
It’s cold
It’s hot
She’s gone
I can breathe
“Because of letourneau”
She’s back…
My heart races.
My mind is frantic
I’m scared…
I expect the memories to come back…
They don’t
I relax.

Finally I can breathe
My hearts heavy knowing I can’t talk to someone
I had recently fell for.
It’s not fair.
Why can’t I ever find someone…

Notifications
My phones going off my stomach drops thinking it’s her
She removed me from her friends list.
Maybe blocked
I don’t know.
It hurts
What do I do with this?