The way it is

Life is beautiful and so full of greatness but contradicted by all the shitty things. Is it horrible luck or just fate testing me by surrounding my environment with suck! Waiting for me to crack is that it? Do I have to embrace the suck and fight depression to make it over the hill? Is the grass really greener on the other side? Struggling up the hill from losing faith in believing life is meant to grow for the better. I contemplate if I should get stronger and keep fighting but it seems I just build endurance to deal with more suck to come. When does it get better? Will it? I look around at others greater quality of living of "luck" not being ignorant to those that suffer more but selfish wondering why my life can't be bliss. If its there why can I not acquire it? I am tired but not beat I will work only merely to try and  not lose the fight but to just skate on the thin ice hoping that soon I will hit solid ground. In life and in dreams nothing is impossible, or is it? The word Possible may only be a substitute for hope and it only comes around so often. My conclusion-you win some you lose some ..... But then again that's just another saying to trick the mind in being some what optimist.