Heart Won't Let Go

Why does my heart hold on?
To someone that's not there.
To someone who doesn't care.
It's honestly just not fair.

I don't want to love him.
When did this even begin?
It hit me out of nowhere.
And now I live in fear.

Fear that one day he'll be gone.
And I took too long.
To tell him my feelings.
To properly fix him.

And fear that everyone will know.
That my heart isn't actually cold.
I don't know how to emotionally grow.
Because for some things, my heart won't let go.