I Did This for Me (Subliminally for You)

A new cycle brings a tired repeat  
Of former transgressions I've seen before.
As if last time was not enough,
I begin another endeavor that will drive me to the floor.  
 
On my knees again, this time to pray,  
I'm begging God to change me from the inside out.
I've been losing hope again;
It happens whenever I question what my life is about.  
 
Quick fixes never help me;
I know this time will be no different than the last.  
Habits die hard with a horrid shriek,
As I keep trying to deal with my past.  
 
Daily habits begin to evolve,  
Following my heart that is changing, too.
A heavy blow from life shakes me
Down to the ground again where I scream for you.  
 
Growing into the woman I should be
Is driven by the thought of us and forever.
All else is gone, but it never satisfied me, anyway.  
Is it too late for us to be together?