High There

What if my life could be lived with the absence of chasing highs?
If the stars twinkles and michevous winks could be romantic enough
To woo my gaze from this growing hole in the ground?

What if my love had more depth than fleeting storybook moments
Stolen just to piece together the most beautifully tragic, heart filling masterpiece?
If perhaps the perhaps of forever called louder than nails in your heart
To a cross on the wall to be the intrigue and horror of whoever may gaze?

What if I were more than just a lost girl who fell behind in the art of becoming
Mindlessly chasing the empty promise of happiness
Dangled on the end of a string that snaps just as the climax ends
And familiarity becomes a looming boogyman that I must destroy?

What if love had shown a spotlight on my deepest deprivations
Before the scent of his male desire became a straight rush to the head.
Consumed with the vision of heaven down the tunnel
A borrowed nurtured dream was still never what it promised.

What if I stopped dancing my limping ego around what could be my blessing?
Abandoned the custom order heart ache that I fashioned from my deepest wounds?
Deep enough to see the darkness where my gentlest love hides
Shaking and afraid to show her face, although I gently coax her to touch my soul.