deepundergroundpoetry.com
I Fell Asleep
I fell asleep at the wheel and woke up
a wreck.
Wondering how I got here and how I could
get back,to things I had been steering
towards.
The places, people and things
that I knew would add
zing to my life.
Was it the right or the left that
took me down that wrong path.
The path of self destruction that
caused the exhaustion, inducing
lethargy and made me so weak.
I grasped the wheel trying hard not
to sleep but the exhaustion had
taken such hold of me, making my eyes,
arms and mind so weak,
I could not hold on I fell asleep at
the wheel and woke up a wreck.
How, if ever will I get back!
a wreck.
Wondering how I got here and how I could
get back,to things I had been steering
towards.
The places, people and things
that I knew would add
zing to my life.
Was it the right or the left that
took me down that wrong path.
The path of self destruction that
caused the exhaustion, inducing
lethargy and made me so weak.
I grasped the wheel trying hard not
to sleep but the exhaustion had
taken such hold of me, making my eyes,
arms and mind so weak,
I could not hold on I fell asleep at
the wheel and woke up a wreck.
How, if ever will I get back!
Published 22nd Feb 2012
| Edited 23rd Feb 2012
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23rd Feb 2012 00:04am
I can so relate to this poem. It put words to how I have been feeling since I got back from deployment. Thanks
23rd Feb 2012 00:18am
No, thank you for serving Us.. Nice to know it helped.. I wrote this in 2005 in all of thirty minutes. Little did I know, I was soon to be in the most enormous turmoil of my life. Something I thought I would never wake up from but thankfully I did..
23rd Feb 2012 2:23am
yeah, nice job here drogeddarain.
I'm assuming it's a running metaphor in which case
it's pretty good.
you could probably get away with dropping the 'once' before knew on the 7th and change 'making'
to 'made' on the 13th. 'it made my arms and mind so weak' on the 16th. purely because you are describing a past event. ie. 'fell asleep at the wheel'
that said, it is in my opinion pretty good.
fair play.
I'm assuming it's a running metaphor in which case
it's pretty good.
you could probably get away with dropping the 'once' before knew on the 7th and change 'making'
to 'made' on the 13th. 'it made my arms and mind so weak' on the 16th. purely because you are describing a past event. ie. 'fell asleep at the wheel'
that said, it is in my opinion pretty good.
fair play.
23rd Feb 2012 2:31am
Thank you Eamon you're right.. Yes it's a running metaphor.. I shall make the changes now.. =)
25th Feb 2012 9:11pm
I can relate to this one...don't you wish you could go back in time and fix things? I know I do. This one really touched my heart.
25th Feb 2012 10:33pm
Yes there are times I indeed do and there are times I wish that the ones that caused some of the lethargy in me would have just gone away when asked the first time...
