Cold Hearted

You hated me when I was there and you hated me if I wasn’t.

So what am I to you, if I’m not just something that is supposed to be with you through thick and thin, through hail sleet and snow, through all the pain you constantly drag me through?

 During your darkest times, I was there. When you felt like all hope was loss and an end to it was your way out. I was there to push those thoughts out and remind you that there are better times to come.  

Even after you put me through so much pain and your refusal to acknowledge me. To let others get close to me, so that you can heal and I can no long feel unwanted.

I didn’t leave.

I’ve known you longer then anyone else. I know  you both inside and out, but you want to act as if I never existed. Leaving me to ponder my own worth...my own existence. Leaving me to want to break free of this cold world you placed me in and find warmth in someone else.

But I stayed

Stayed in hopes of you one day realizing that you needed me just as much as I needed you.

A fool I was.

Thinking things will change. Thinking that you would notice the beating in your chest is me asking...no, begging for more. But I guess you will never accept me. Leaving me to suffer your cold alone.