December 8th, 1980

Tonight is a night of special remembrance for me.
It is more than an anniversary of the death of John Lennon, which is an anual day of mourning even after 40 years. I still feel the sorrow and pain of that night. But there is a bittersweet memory connected to John's death that to this day affects my every day life. And although I would trade without delay or second thought, every poem I have ever written to stop the murder of John Lennon, it was because of his death that I am to this day a poet and lover of verse. I note this every year on this date because it so profoundly affected me as poetry has become such an important part of my life. I have made so many friends in the poetry community, some who I consider dear friends. When I think if all the poetry readings I went to, hearing the verse of so many poets over the years and being able to share the spoken word of my own verse, I become deeply emotional on this day and all through the night.
So it is very hard to reconcile my mixed emotions on this night. My life would be so different had that night not transpired as it did. But for all of the positive things that have come out of my life in poetry, as deeply as I love all that has come to me because of it, even the dearest of friends, still I would give it all back to save the life of one man who meant so much to me and to so many others.

If you do not know the story of what transpired in my life that particular night, I invite you to read the poem I wrote that night and how it changed my life forever. I will post a link here so that you may read it if you wish...
There is a full explanation in the comments section under the poem. Just scroll down alittle to the comment I added on September 14th, 2011, 3rd one down.

https://deepundergroundpoetry.com/poems/28763-aisumasen-renee/

JJ