deepundergroundpoetry.com
La Belle Dame sans Merci
You came to me,
came to me once,
upon my war bound leaving you,
with wilding words,
love soaked.
burnished, honey white,
then slipping from your parted mouth,
unfolding in my ear
so like an easy sleep,
so like the sloughing movement of the stars
on Summer nights,
of how, of how
you’d wait the long days out,
the even longer nights,
‘till I returned.
You pulled me downward,
slowly down,
as if you gravity
and I some helpless thing
within the air
to drift me, snowfall, to your face
for gifting me
your favoured kiss goodby.
And how I then lost sense
of tenses, time.
And how I couldn’t breathe!
To this dark armored one
now so disarmed,
your plighting lips, your tongue,
your tears,
your heart ached charms,
were merciless.
came to me once,
upon my war bound leaving you,
with wilding words,
love soaked.
burnished, honey white,
then slipping from your parted mouth,
unfolding in my ear
so like an easy sleep,
so like the sloughing movement of the stars
on Summer nights,
of how, of how
you’d wait the long days out,
the even longer nights,
‘till I returned.
You pulled me downward,
slowly down,
as if you gravity
and I some helpless thing
within the air
to drift me, snowfall, to your face
for gifting me
your favoured kiss goodby.
And how I then lost sense
of tenses, time.
And how I couldn’t breathe!
To this dark armored one
now so disarmed,
your plighting lips, your tongue,
your tears,
your heart ached charms,
were merciless.
Published 16th Nov 2020
Author's Note
ekphrasis on John William Waterhouse's painting
https://www.meisterdrucke.uk/fine-art-prints/John-William-Waterhouse/687887/The-beautiful-lady-without-mercy.html
https://www.meisterdrucke.uk/fine-art-prints/John-William-Waterhouse/687887/The-beautiful-lady-without-mercy.html
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Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
16th Nov 2020 6:22pm
16th Nov 2020 6:57pm
Could you please be more specific? Abstractions do not help me in knowing what "works" and how it does when it does so.
16th Nov 2020 6:26pm
A variation:
You, with all your tawny hair
untied,
unrolling in a burst of fawn, of sage,
a rage of Autumn light,
you came to me,
came to me once,
upon my war bound leaving you,
came with wild words,
love soaked,
burnished, honey white,
then slipping from your parted mouth,
unfolding in my ear
so like an easy sleep,
so like the sloughing movement of the stars
on Summer nights,
of how, of how
you’d wait the long days out,
the even longer nights,
‘till I returned.
You pulled me downward,
slowly down, insistently,
as if you gravity
and I some helpless thing
within the air
to drift me, snowfall, to your face
for gifting me
your favouring
your flavoured kiss goodby.
And how I then lost sense
of tenses, time.
And how I couldn’t breathe against
that moment’s tumbling bliss.
To this dark armored one
now so disarmed,
your plighting lips, your tongue,
your tears,
the haloed look of you,
your heart ached charms,
that I’d not know immediate again
for years,
were merciless.
You, with all your tawny hair
untied,
unrolling in a burst of fawn, of sage,
a rage of Autumn light,
you came to me,
came to me once,
upon my war bound leaving you,
came with wild words,
love soaked,
burnished, honey white,
then slipping from your parted mouth,
unfolding in my ear
so like an easy sleep,
so like the sloughing movement of the stars
on Summer nights,
of how, of how
you’d wait the long days out,
the even longer nights,
‘till I returned.
You pulled me downward,
slowly down, insistently,
as if you gravity
and I some helpless thing
within the air
to drift me, snowfall, to your face
for gifting me
your favouring
your flavoured kiss goodby.
And how I then lost sense
of tenses, time.
And how I couldn’t breathe against
that moment’s tumbling bliss.
To this dark armored one
now so disarmed,
your plighting lips, your tongue,
your tears,
the haloed look of you,
your heart ached charms,
that I’d not know immediate again
for years,
were merciless.
16th Nov 2020 7:39pm
16th Nov 2020 8:56pm
Definition of merciless
: having or showing no mercy : PITILESS
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/merciless
merciless
adjective disapproving
US /ˈmɝː.sɪ.ləs/ UK /ˈmɜː.sɪ.ləs/
having or showing no mercy:
https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/dictionary/english/merciless
: having or showing no mercy : PITILESS
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/merciless
merciless
adjective disapproving
US /ˈmɝː.sɪ.ləs/ UK /ˈmɜː.sɪ.ləs/
having or showing no mercy:
https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/dictionary/english/merciless
17th Nov 2020 10:56am
Dear Baldwin,
1- l like the images in your poem. They are very impressive. I like your poem.
2-upon my war bound leaving you,
till I returned.
as if you gravity
3- They should be: upon my war bound FOR leaving ...
4-'till, should be, 'til OR till without apostrophe.
5- as if you WERE gravity.
It's a poem that deserves appreciation.
1- l like the images in your poem. They are very impressive. I like your poem.
2-upon my war bound leaving you,
till I returned.
as if you gravity
3- They should be: upon my war bound FOR leaving ...
4-'till, should be, 'til OR till without apostrophe.
5- as if you WERE gravity.
It's a poem that deserves appreciation.
