deepundergroundpoetry.com
Putting it to the vote
All to know that great ideal, standing in the bear pit
the hot air of oratory
the put-down of the sarcastic quip
all the parties the majority and minority
Duplicity the speed turned on its heel
self serving rats that just exploit
backhanders slipped, to oil the wheels
complicity that's never joint
Economy of truth a wayward quoit
no fairness deemed to fight the cause
the spinning ring that missed the point
in aimlessness without a pause
Spin and wind of misdirection
for those all green behind the ears
a law for good, a misperception
cuddle all the babies, to endear
Now load the powder in the keg
conspiracy to gain the edge
for government the useless gang
prevarication destroyed in a gigantic bang
the hot air of oratory
the put-down of the sarcastic quip
all the parties the majority and minority
Duplicity the speed turned on its heel
self serving rats that just exploit
backhanders slipped, to oil the wheels
complicity that's never joint
Economy of truth a wayward quoit
no fairness deemed to fight the cause
the spinning ring that missed the point
in aimlessness without a pause
Spin and wind of misdirection
for those all green behind the ears
a law for good, a misperception
cuddle all the babies, to endear
Now load the powder in the keg
conspiracy to gain the edge
for government the useless gang
prevarication destroyed in a gigantic bang
Published 24th Oct 2020
| Edited 26th Oct 2020
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24th Oct 2020 2:33pm
This reminds me of Guy Fawkes' attempt to blow up Parliament. I wonder had he succeeded if things would've changed. There are a few things here I could suggest:
Duplicity the speed turned on its heel
self serving rats that just exploit
backhanders just to oil the wheels
complicity that's never joint
Economy of truth a wayward quoit
no fairness just to fight the cause
the spinning ring that missed the point
in aimlessness without a pause
You've used 'just' three times in these two stanzas. You could rewrite and eliminate two in the following:
backhanders to oil the wheels
and
no fairness deemed to fight the cause ( or something along those lines )
If you eliminate the second, then the third won't seem as obvious, being it's a different stanza.
Duplicity the speed turned on its heel
self serving rats that just exploit
backhanders just to oil the wheels
complicity that's never joint
Economy of truth a wayward quoit
no fairness just to fight the cause
the spinning ring that missed the point
in aimlessness without a pause
You've used 'just' three times in these two stanzas. You could rewrite and eliminate two in the following:
backhanders to oil the wheels
and
no fairness deemed to fight the cause ( or something along those lines )
If you eliminate the second, then the third won't seem as obvious, being it's a different stanza.
24th Oct 2020 3:41pm
Anonymous
24th Oct 2020 3:35pm
"Now load the powder in the keg
conspiracy to gain the edge
for government the useless gang
prevarication destroyed in a gigantic bang"
Excellent, Slip. * Let it blow, let it blow * ( sung in Disneyesque fashion )
conspiracy to gain the edge
for government the useless gang
prevarication destroyed in a gigantic bang"
Excellent, Slip. * Let it blow, let it blow * ( sung in Disneyesque fashion )
