The Pain

He was once a young child .
Dreams so big .
Then the pain visited him.
Each time it would take away something.
And each time it would add something.
The trades were never even.
The scales were always tilted in unfairness.
Eventually there was nothing to take .
But the pain still lingered, and piled on.
He was tortured by those around him who seemed normal , and hapy.
He felt out of place , and damaged.
He found a way to kill the pain.
But with every solution, lies a consequence.
For what he thought was killing the pain , was secretly adding more to his sorrow.
An invisible parasite bleeding it's host dry.
Robbing him of all of his dignity , and ambition.
He one day discovered the very thing that killed the pain was in fact trying to kill him .
He was in love with the numbness , and love often blinds us to the true intentions of others.
He realized while trying to break free he was now more trapped and lost than before.
He fought , and fought with all of his strength, and might.
He was able to finally get free .
But the life , and person he once knew was no longer there.
He again felt alone , and like a stranger to himself .
Not only that but the pain never left .
It lurked under the surface ready to attack him again.
The reality he faced was more than he could stand.
The haunting nostalgia from the past made him sad, and regretful.
When we lose touch with all that is real, we make ourselves beacons for the demons that lie in wait.
He often questioned his purpose, when it was so bright and clear before.
Doubt creates hesitation, and hesitation breeds failure.
Was he afraid to succeed, or was he just afraid to feel again?
He often prayed for that elusive moment when one decides to win , no matter the consequences.
A day when it all makes sense again .
 A day when it becomes obvious that the pain was necessary to fully appreciate true happiness .
My bitter enemy exiled.
My life forever changed.