demon-kind

 
darkness dawn in my soul
it pull back my covers
and reveal me in my naked innocence
it enter my inner sanctum
turning my sanctuary poisonous

I ward my spirit
I call to the creator
to no avail

seems I had some business with these creatures
they had the keys inside me...they unlock my doors
and made themselves comfy on my low self-esteem

it's been fifteen years now
and I know them intimately
it's my own voice I'm unsure of
it's so foreign to me

I tell my truth...they say, liar!!
pushing into my thoughts...getting the goods
all to separate fact from fiction inside me

saying this is legion's region
then they reveal to me the intelligence they've gathered
scoffing you have mommy and daddy issues
Sigmund Freud should be able to help you

I wonder what I did
to be in need of such close observations
my comings and going recorded
then reported back to the demon's master

Lucifer

seems I'm a person of interest
to what I end I don't know
nothing to see here I think...move it along

I even have a place in their hierarchy
my position will only be comfortable
if I'm obedient to them
following their strict guidelines
I'm breaking the rules just talking about them

repressed and held hostage
inside the darkness I thought I'd lost it for good
that's when our Creator stormed the doors --
and brought me back into myself

he was my constant visitor those rough months
I would say Daddy I have bone to pick with you
and I would proceed to tell him my beef
then we would wrestle all night like he did Jacob of the bible

I could hear the demon's scurrying--
 to be anywhere else but here
saying no not this time man, I'm out of here

it was very surreal
having my soul returned to me
I thought I had lost me for good

I met out creator again as I did when I was an infant
after my mom abandoned me and left me for dead
he collected me to his breast and fed my soul succor

shaken but on my way to healing
I still struggle today blurring the lines of captor and divinity
Stockholm syndrome...I guess for the demonically possessed

with just one voice inside me now I get a little lonely
talking to our creator is beautiful but daunting

will I overcome and ever feel good enough?
will I ever recognize these demons as jailers, not my family?

were they demons and if not who and what were they?

but I know you demonkind
you are just on my periphery
displaced and disembodied
looking for a way back in

if it were up to me even a demon would get a tree contract
and access to the tree of life
but I have a feeling you're conniving me on desiring penance

do you have love for our maker?

were you with him since the foundations?

he spoke into the darkness and created the light

were you there my dark demon family?
did he conquer the night?
or simply conjure the sun?

safe passage back the way you came is all I can offer you tonight
a new host should be provided to you shortly
a new soul in need of flavoring

is it wrong to feel saddened?
I have a feeling they're not leaving anyway
call it motherly instinct

I make sure their fed good
can't let little innocence starve
no matter how mischievous