Searching for love

There are secrets I want or need to find    
In a place so divine the sunshine      
Will never leave you behind      
Where gentle feelings  
contain genuine healing      
A place where you can be your best    
Without a trial or test      
To cherish a hug or a kiss  
as a bittersweet gift      
To have poetic purpose  
without feeling hopeless or worthless      
If my life is a lie why to I try to decide,      
to be honest, patient, and caring
my heart is tearing      
How long will I last, where can I laugh,      
screaming just to ask, crying from my past      
Not comfortable to speak,  
but in there eyes forces me to teach      
Truth that all of us are precious      
while lack of understanding,  
leaving me so breathless      
Cause the presence of there touch    
is blowing me to dust      
cant control my feeling,  
just trying not to cuss      
Ill wear your armor of trust,
while my tears turn to rust      
If I survive please tell me ill alive      
I will never despise to let you realize      
That love is the truth, holding on to you