DRUNK

she was drunk
on beer and self pity,
slipping out
before the bartender
noticed,
staggering,
bumping
into shit
on the way
to the car
then fumbling
with the keys
before she finally
got it cranked

she knew better
then to drive like that
but she did it anyway
straddling
the center line,
swerving,
almost clipping a mailbox
first,
then
a parked car
but pushing on
through the night,
waiting for the
blue light
in the
rear view

finally
making it home

once inside
she fell across
the mattress
nauseous
wishing
she could
just pass out
or at least
stop the
spinning,
praying,
swearing
she’d quit
that she’d to do better
and just let
all the bullshit
go – the way he left,
the things he said
but knowing
even in her drunken state
that it’s never as easy
as just letting a thing go
and tomorrow night
she’d be watching
that same sad movie
in her head