To all the boys I loved before

To all the boys I loved before.
Why did you hurt me the way you did?
Taking my heart, torn in two,
Stomping that and the trust I gave you  
Into the ground with your mud-covered shoes.  
 
And you,
why did you force yourself into me the way you did?
Hurting my insides,
Making me do things that I never really did want to do.  
You, my dear, made me feel wrong and dirty.
You made me feel unloved for the rest of my life.  
Why did you think it was okay for you to do those things to me,
Expecting no consequences.  
 
You, you hid me from everyone that made you smile.  
You would sneak me into your house in the middle of the night,
just so no one would see me,  
but you said it was for our privacy during our intimate moments.  
Why did you decide to make me feel ashamed of who I was?
You tricked me into loving you.  
I thought I was finally being loved by someone,  
but all you wanted to do was use me over and over every night when you wanted.
 
Why do you love me
with all of your big and kind heart?
Why do you not use me and hide me away as everyone else has done to me?
Is this what it is liked to be loved
truly by another human being?
Is this what it is like to be completely happy
and to feel safe
while I am in your arms?
 
Why were you given to me, my dear Sunshine?