Late Dawns And Early Evenings

Love this simple imagery and portraying something like cold ice as a warm promise of winter.

The only line I had difficulty with was this one:

only for it to turn to ice once evening falls

But, the alliteration, assonance, and consonance of it is so delicious, I honestly could suggest nothing for improvement.

Thanks for your feedback, Ahavati.

Great stuff! Very much felt your words

Thanks very much, Hunterapsych.

Another 'wintery' themed piece from you Lozzamus. You create the atmospher ok though.

I see two lines which are all monosyllable.
Line 5 = 8 syllables
Line 7 = only 5 syllables (My thoughts are to up the syllable count)

Say:-
long sleepy nights and late lazy dawns.  ~  9 syllables

Kind regards, Alan

Thanks, Alan.