Dreams

My Angel,

I love your poetry, it is fresh, new, unique and is developing everyday with better and better writes, which is why I will help where ever I can.
This piece is just talent in a box. Let’s look at the small things and make it outstanding.

Stanza 1 – Line 8..
“Those one scared me the most.” – One is singular you could say ones (plural) or They scared me the most.
In Stanza 1 you use the word still twice in both occasions I think the piece would flow better without it.
In Stanza 2 & 3
You use multiple dots six times, I don’t see need for them and feels like it kills the flow, the only one that might be safe is…
“like heaven and hell to me...”
In Stanza 3
The last line why do you have two ?? question marks... Can I ask why?
Stanza 3 – Line 9
“Follow you dreams” The possessive of you is YOUR
Last Line
“when they can never come true” you loose your punch with too many words try this “they never come true?”

This is a wonderful write and I really enjoyed reading it over and over. Well Done.
Thank you for the read.

Blue Skies Angel
Al –x-

I am always happy to see you have given me advice:)
Thank you

i like it

We all make them. It seem as you write what you feel without looking back. Not one to use a thesaurus or grammar check. You truly speak your mind. Not to woof one the first comment. I'm a firm believer write what you feel and don't look back. Loved the poem.

dream...
greatest inspiration if wee
drop/let-go-of thee good/bad duality---
fear no nightmare,
cling2no daydream,
embrace every dream as revelation, (&
leave yr ego-projections about'em alone)...

love 1dream at at time...comfortable or discomfitting, it all You

dream on, D'angel

Lets fill your mind and world with delightful visuals and thoughts to turn the switch toward dreams that do bring smiles.

You are missed.

I like this and as someone who has nightmares I can agree