Two Alices

My man and I live in an apartment complex I can't stand;
Where we know two Alices; and one lives in Wonderland.

One Alice is African-American and keeps lots of noisy company;
The other, in her head, has a family.

Out of these two Alices
This one very much likes symbols that imply fallaces.

This woman is majorly disturbed;
Sometimes it makes my husband quite perturbed.

In Food Lion, she once talked to a dog on a dog food bag;
It almost made our deceased friend gag.

She will stop traffic in her car just to wave and say, "Hi!",
Severe mentall illness is her alibi.

She used to have on my man a big crush, and for sex, she would push;
It almost made my man vomit when she grabbed his tush.

She hits on every man in town;
But, I feel sorry for her when she is down.

She's fifty-something and acts like a little girl;
Her hair is straight and has no curl.

She wears quite a lot of make-up on her face;
To other mentally disabled people, she is a disgrace.

All of the police in town know of her;
She's tried to get every man she's ever met to be her lover.

She actually thought, with my man, she had a chance;
When he wouldn't even give her a second glance.

I'd feel sorry for her if it weren't my man, she'd hit on;
She probably needs newspapers to shit on.

Sorry I'm being a big bitch who is sick;
But, one of my personalities, out of being mean, gets a kick!