Behind my eyes

As the thoughts bring me to a place
That brings tears from my face
I remember the relationships and things that did not last
Looking into my past

Everything seems to come and go
Even if you love them so
Pictures I still have and memories I refuse to erase
In my mind I cannot replace

I pretend to move on but deep down it's still there
Yet of course everyone moves on from me and that is not fair
I give everything I have til there is no more
All my effort going toward that one person I adore

So I sit here retired from dating
Forever debating
Is it worth starting all over again?
Isolating my self to a degree I feel like I'm 10

In time I will decide
Based on many emotions that forever reside
In my heart there is still a need
Defeat I refuse to concede

Inside my soul
One day I wish to be whole
With someone new
May they remain true

I wish to fly
Like a bird who gazes into the sky
There are so many reasons to blame
A million exist and none are the same

If love is there will I know?
Or will it leave before it will grow?
Oh what is to say?
As all my hope and energy just fails in a way

I close my eyes and wonder why
With all my might preventing myself to cry
I tend to give my best
Until I rest

In my grave when I am done
Another journey will begin at the rise of the sun
Oh silly me I'm still young you see
I cannot escape there is much more to my future history


Slowly climbing out of misery
One day I will be set free