a writer's curse

There is an addictive Gene that causes this and will be present in anything you do. I carry it as well. Lesser amounts work for me with the same adrenaline rush. https://www.rehabs.com/5-ways-you-can-be-physiologically-predisposed-for-addiction/

thank you dearest Tim sigh I know you're right it's manifested in me in so many ways... drug-free or not...  

for now, I will focus my energies on being drug-free and writing less...I will research the link you sent...  

I deeply appreciate the help...

love Brenda

Dear Brenda, in arcaiche Italian a poet would be called "Vate", with the mean of he/she who bares the word. His words would be "vaticini", with the meaning of words with messages. The same word would have been used to indicate a prophet or an oracle. No poet writes truly without inspiration. A true poet is a bearer of messages. It's not a crime, nor a plague. It is an addiction, as he or she who writes under inspiration, can't help but deliver what they "hear" or "feel". Prophets doomed themselves for not being able to flee the visions or what they heard. You can impose to not write but would that make you happy? And I don't believe it is a drug related problem (I could be wrong and do follow whatever indications a professional gives you) but I believe that it comes from beyond any human or material factor and the beauty of your writings are beyond anything I have ever read in contemporary literature, which I find very challenging artisticwise. You always pull me in. So bless you for existing and giving us your words. Always if that makes you feel right and happy. Regardless of what I think, you always do what is right and good for you. Hugs forever. J.

Well stated ... ;)

dearest Juvenalis you are a wealth of knowledge in regards to history and poetry...I feel blessed to know that others came before me who felt similarly about their gift...it's true what you point out I can't write without inspiration and I feel driven to write... it's true I have no choice the words come to me even while I sleep they are never silent...you honor me greatly with your love of my writings...that I gratefully receive... it is a beautiful honor thank you for helping me see...

love & hugs...

Brenda

Sometimes it`s hard
to stay on the path of
consistency, particularly
in the absence of writing
for fear - and as you stated -
of never writing again.  I
would like to think
that something far more
than past addiction[s] is
consuming you; maybe
you`re battling with your
pen or some kind of
compulsiveness or maybe
you just lost a little
bit of your poetic magic.  I know
this place is constantly
changing members and that
love & erotica tend to overshadow
all the other poetic catagories
and that could pose as
potential downers or maybe
some have forgotten what
good poetry is, and you, my Lady
have written some great killer poems;
poems I wished I could have written.
Well, I am sorry that I couldn`t offer
any other advice as JTim & J66 have
both left some great marks, so
I will leave you with a bit of I love you,
and that I look forward to your
next poem, smackdown, crim or not,
you`re still 100% Brenda.

~your ally in darkness, Devlin  

I second your motion. Dear Brenda, your writings are the ones that made me fall in love with DUP. Without you, this place would feel lonely. Hugs and love. J

thank you my beautiful Dark Queen for your deep consideration of my thoughts here... I can't just stop writing that would drive me bonkers lol :)  I'm inspired even while sleeping as I said and pushed to write while resting... as you know we can only write what is inspired perhaps i'm being punished by my muse for my indulgences...we are constantly in evolution as writers I believe I'm evolving or devolving as the case may be... whatever the case i'm possessed with the need to spill the words whether they create art or land like vomit on the page...I deeply appreciate your love of my poems that means the world to me because I respect you and your pen so much...thank you for seeing my reflection in my writes... in all of them :)

I love you lady...

Brenda

I wish I could spill ink on to the page like you...your output is phenomenal...

thank you graciously dearest Dark Sun you know even when I'm sleeping i'm dreaming about words and writing...

it's both a blessing and a curse if i'm honest...

love Brenda

without words what'll I be
without words who'll I be
these are questions I constantly ask myself
I guess every poet feels this way

great write

Wow I feel that last comment,

When you wrote that piece about your three selves, I thought of Cerberus, the three headed dog from mythology..

You always come up with great stuff :)

Very good. I think I can relate to this one.