deepundergroundpoetry.com
PERFECT MATCH
Idyllic life lead in the main
Save lack of love could not complain
A scientist, sage seer
By feminine charms oft smitten
Wooing tried, given the mitten
Alone till death his fear
Spied he was on French holiday
Strolling on the Champs-Élysées
Square rigged, right proper swell
On arm best bib and tucker dressed
A lady with great beauty blessed
Where found he one so belle?
It seems he desperate for a mate
Weary of leaving life to fate
Companionship devoid
He set to task his fertile brain
Inventing love he’s sure to gain
A steam drive humanoid
Each morn they leave their lover’s bed
He pours cold water in her head
One nose press primes the pump
Behind left breast deposits coal
Strikes match to light the heart and soul
wakes she then with a jump
Bang-up job he’s done on his wife
Made to last at least his whole life
For making love designed
Comfort he feels in her embrace
A smile always graces her face
His kiss never declined
Save lack of love could not complain
A scientist, sage seer
By feminine charms oft smitten
Wooing tried, given the mitten
Alone till death his fear
Spied he was on French holiday
Strolling on the Champs-Élysées
Square rigged, right proper swell
On arm best bib and tucker dressed
A lady with great beauty blessed
Where found he one so belle?
It seems he desperate for a mate
Weary of leaving life to fate
Companionship devoid
He set to task his fertile brain
Inventing love he’s sure to gain
A steam drive humanoid
Each morn they leave their lover’s bed
He pours cold water in her head
One nose press primes the pump
Behind left breast deposits coal
Strikes match to light the heart and soul
wakes she then with a jump
Bang-up job he’s done on his wife
Made to last at least his whole life
For making love designed
Comfort he feels in her embrace
A smile always graces her face
His kiss never declined
Published 30th May 2018
Author's Note
If love won't come to you, you go to love.
For this piece I adopted an apparently ancient meter used by Tennyson in "The Lady Of Shalott," At least attempted to do so.
For this piece I adopted an apparently ancient meter used by Tennyson in "The Lady Of Shalott," At least attempted to do so.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 8
reading list entries 2
comments 12
reads 759
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Loving the alliteration...I'm getting a feeling it's a love robot or maybe just a metaphor for a tryst with a cold heart
30th May 2018 9:19pm
Tim, right on the money with "love robot." I wrote this for the Steampunk challenge...had to do a bit of research, not being a steamer myself. I wrote in a meter that was used by Tennyson just to pay feeble homage to a great Victorian poet.
Thank you so much for your words of encouragement! Cheers!
Thank you so much for your words of encouragement! Cheers!
30th May 2018 8:24pm
Love that meter and rhyme! That android could be the love of your life. I know she would be of mine. Perfection in poetry and invention!
30th May 2018 9:23pm
I am very glad you like this, Sir Crow! We can arrange to have one built to you spec or you can rent :D I am having fun dabbling with different poetic styles and meter. I appreciate your words of encouragement! Cheers!
31st May 2018 2:24am
Every time I read your new poem I just found you were attempting a new style of poem. You are a poem researcher indeed. Love the meter and rhyme. It read beautifully harmonious and refreshing.
love
Jasmine
love
Jasmine
31st May 2018 3:14am
Jasmine, What matters most to me is the message, the story. However, I enjoy the challenge of telling a story by means of a classic construct. There's magic found walking the path of great poets gleaning pearls of wisdom. Thank you so much for your encouraging words. You can ❤😀
31st May 2018 12:53pm
I'm not familiar with that particular meter but it's fantastic to give it a try and the poem itself is beautiful and tender, flawless.
31st May 2018 9:46pm
Thank you Layla! I found the meter on a web page describing Victorian poetry. The hardest lines of each stanza were the 3rd and the 6th because they are 3 feet rather than the 4 in 1,2,4 &5. Also maintaining the rhythm with the aabccb rhyming structure.
Your feedback is especially valuable to me...thank you for your kind words. <3
Your feedback is especially valuable to me...thank you for your kind words. <3
1st Jun 2018 1:59am
Bravo, Gahdess! Me encanto tu poema, y senti paz y alegria con tus palabras.
1st Jun 2018 4:02am
Muchas gracias querida Luna! El hecho que te dio paz me da mucha alegria. Aprecio mucho tus palabras tan amables.
2nd Jun 2018 4:52pm
Love the use of traditional forms ... always so envious ... such careful reverence to poetry ... bravo GW!
2nd Jun 2018 6:20pm
Thank you so much LDF! I do enjoy the challenge of implementing different styles of poetry. This was fun to learn more about Victorian culture and the Steampunk community. I appreciate your kind words of encouragement.
