ruined

I ruined me
my body and soul
will never be clean again  
 
Unfortunately  
I can't erase my history  
it sticks to me  
and molds me into who I am  
 
The me I used to see  
is never returning  
she's been edited away  
hacked into and re-saved  
the old version deleted
at high cost – data lost  
she's irrecoverable  
 
Now she's messy,  
scribbled over, tainted  
and sentenced to carry  
burdens growing ever heavy  
Now she's scarred, she's  
damaged and dirty  
Unwanted, unneeded  
Now she's unloveable