Yonoze

I am causing this pain
This headache I have
Iz my own doing
This fux azz shit
Iz all my fault
Ripping off bandaids
Pouring pink Hemalian salt in
Walking into brick walls head first
Im doing these hateful things
Im not remembering
To not forget my worth
Disregarding who I am
What the fauq is wrong with me
It may be selfish and foolish
To pray for peace
I so need it, restful and lasting
Not these unfynyshed
Broken peacez of me I see
I don't want to blame anyone
For things in or out of my control
Because essentially
It is about control? No?
Self disciplined control
I want to consciously know me
So that im not constantly running
From me
I want to hold my self value
Above my word, you know
Boundaries, standards
I don't want to worry about me
With certain life's issues
ANYMORE
I am responsible for how
I allow me and others to treat me
Regret sets in and anger takes hold when there is no one but me to blame for my choices
Weather they yield intended outcomes or facilitated
Rooms of remorseful regretz.