Nobody you found

How can I even think about betraying someone?
Someone who holds me so tight,
Maybe a little too tight,
Won't let me breathe!
Who is the real me?
Have I gotten sucked into another mistake?
Or am I happy in another world and I can't awake?
Awake from what is really dragging me in,
Saying, "Come on,you can't win!
You can't win in the real world,
It's all gonna tumble on you girl.
Just hold your breathe and wait for it to be over,
Wait till the pain finally becomes sober.
Just grab the sharpest thing you can find,
Listen to what is sent to your mind.
And then pray to the dear lord for cutting your life short.
Blaim it on anybody except for yourself,
You denied it so nobody came to help.
Look at what you've done now,
You wonder who else to blaim but nobody you found."