Innocent thoughts...

Sometimes...
I don't even understand,
How my thoughts could be so innocent.
Sometimes..
I don't know how it is possible,
For me to love.
How it is even possible for me,
To show a girl love.
When I never had anyone to show me.
No one showed me how to treat a women,
No one tought me the wrong and rights.
I learnt myself,
Went with a gut feeling.
When I saw my mum get beat,
I understood it wasn't right.
It wasn't love.
I never had a male role model.
The only role model I had,
Was the one that ruined this house.
My father wasn't there,
Still isn't.
But I kinda like it that way.
I don't know why,
It's how it's always been.
I've learnt everything by myself.
I don't know how it's possible for my thoughts,
To be so innocent.
When everything that was pushed into my head,
Was evil.
When everything I saw,
Was wrong.