Guidance

How am I supposed to tell you what's wrong when every decision leading up to this moment has felt and seemed to be right?

(Surely this must of been the path that someone else had  chosen for me)
                                               To be forever obligated to myself and others. With all the choices I half-heartedly carry through in the hopes of biding my time here

Hoping I'll find a path or a door or a window to jump through to find some form of freedom or sleep or blackness (any of which you will allow me). To refrain from this dream that feels mostly unravelled already.

-Building a new structure or tomb only to forget myself in,
I'm lost in this feeling of abandon.

I'm scared to hurt the ones I love but I can't  take this last chance without your  permission . (as though I had ever even had a choice)

My own thoughts and conclusions seem delirious to me
I can't seem to trust in myself any more.

And I've come so far that I no longer know the way...

I wish you would just beckon me home already.


I'm through with this place and all I ever wanted was to feel at home.   With you...


But instead you've left me here- and I worry now that I may never find the way.

That you will have forgotten me by the time I do and the door will be locked when I arrive

I'm sorry


I never meant to be so ignorant. I just never learned how to listen properly.

Won't you teach me?
I need your guidance on my path to find home




Written and published by Nameless_Traveler   -- Andrew Frans Robert Kerklaan