AN EARLY MORNING BLOOMING  (7-8-96, Jackson Square apartment, Galveston Island, Texas)

dawn light adheres
to these giant
transparent  meshed petals
of mosquito netting
which surround me here
enfolded like a bee
i am
here within
this great  translucent
sleeping  hibiscus womb
where i peacefully awaken
to softly flowing streams
of early mornings
magical light
which twist and fold
down throughout
these hazy ghosts
of veil like  fairy tale petals
parenthesized all around me here
not yet fully awakened
nor moving
only passively observing
through my eyes and senses
fully surrendered
to dawns calm stillnesss
here safe at the center
of my bed
where even in and despite
my present state of prolonged
ever increasing decay
here in this slowly waking moment
i feel like a regal
golden stamen
inwardly reflecting
the penetrative
resurrective light
of now ascending
healing  morning sun outside
peripherally seeping through
and around the bordered edges
of thick curtains
drawn and closed
around my bedrooms windows
to sustain nights
lingering shadows
to keep out any too sudden
eye stabbing  harsh  bright
morning light
so i might sleep more late
but now that time has lapsed
as i gaze hypnotically up
high above my bed
into the transcendent
calm circle
serene heart center
of this great  dream like flower
tethered by a string
from a single brass hook
up on the ceiling
high above my bed
which so gently held me all night
within its  benevolent shroud
safe from the six legged
winged  needle nosed
blood suckers bite
now as i begin
to gradually awaken here
within its sweet  diaphanous embrace
sensing and feeling
these thoughts and words
spontaneous  unfiltered
quietly rising up
through me here
in these peculiar impressions
i perceive them as
and become aware
they are also
my rather unorthodox
half asleep  half awake
hypnogogic  semi dream state
subconscious prayer
as impressionistically surreal
as it seems to be and is
still deeply secure
in its delicate lair
i serenely come
to the further realization
that the opening and blooming
of these lifeless petals
around me here
and of myself as well
to this newly unfolding day beyond
this neutral  relative
comfort zone
and temporary  nocturnal respit
from my seemingly relentless suffering
fears and doubts
depends solely upon me
here now
upon me  myself
alone