Holy words

I really like this

I think the words in this piece are spectacular and it hits my hard in the chest. It also makes me think and rethink and reprocess how I feel about a few things. So basically, it does what a poem should do. Well done! The open-ended last line just seals it up nicely. Love.

With that said, I am going to take your ‘encourages honest critique’ at face value. This piece needs punctuation. The (seemingly) random capital letters jump out at me as something of significance when really I think they might just be the start of a new thought. It makes it hard to follow at times. There are lots of thoughts/sentences that start with conjunctions. I am terrible about the exact same thing. It happens in my speech constantly, but when written down, it tends to bog down the piece if that makes sense.

I’ve ‘edited’ this piece the way I would have done it. It obviously is your poem, and you can take or leave it. There are a few lines that I felt were a bit redundant and therefore, not needed. I also changed ‘much heavenly’ because it interrupted the flow of that thought. Just thought I’d throw it out there.

I searched the sky for familiar faces
and listened to oceans for a voice that sings of home.
I always thought that if I held the word of god in my hands,
its weight would pin my soul to the ground
and pour the light of heaven into my eyes.
I struggle to see heaven
in anything except escape.
If I've had any word from god
that word must be
run.
From the past.
From the future.
Run into worlds created by gods no different from me.
All achingly flawed.
Creators of worlds flawless and whole,
the way this one can never be.
It's not enough.
Never will be.
Until I can open a book like a door,
climb through and never look back.

It won't be the words of any god whose name I know.
Those would be filled with fire and judgment.
Filled with words like sin
and justice.
I've only ever felt one of those.

I really like this piece and think it could be a great one with a little polishing.

Very happy to see you back around Good Sir!!!
Wonderful Write presented here-Im a sucker for the emotive-You've caught the quiet and introspective -Made it scream!!!

This is very mysterious and introspective, I like the idea of ' open a book like a door,  climb through and never look back ', that sounds very cool.....

amazing pacing - it becomes urgent and important with every line of this write

it great to see such considered writing