Speaking with No Restraint

I don’t know if you would really understand
Once you heard what I had to say
You’ve known me as one way for all of my life
There is no comprehension that I wouldn’t just stay
I’ve kept things inside for far too long
You never truly saw inside the real me
A shell that was walking this earth in my stead
Through the crowd of all of my friends, no one even bothered to see
I was hiding behind my self-made walls
Holding my own thoughts hostage
Quiet and calm was my public demeanor
True feelings and thoughts were held up in bondage
Slowly but surely they crept through the cracks
One by one finding their footing
Until the dam that held them finally gave way
Emotions in my heart began flooding
The middle transfigured to sudden extremes
I almost was taken aback
I never had dared push in to these things
Never once did take up the slack
Now that they‘re here I hold on to them tight
For fear they will soon go away
And leave me again right in the middle
Where emotion would no longer hold sway

You may think this odd and most unlike me
Just what did I think I was missing?
That’s just the thing, I didn’t really know
I had always just settled for wishing
That I felt like some others who carried passion and fire
Why couldn’t it be me who lived life just like that?
Now that I feel the deep seed within me
Everything before just looks flat
It’s still me inside, just with more flavor
You may find that you like things this way
I’m here just to show that the me that you know
Will not restrain any more what I say