Last Brexit to Nowhere

Kevin Evans had reached his limit.
Fueled by the Tory's propaganda machine,
Kev finally saw his chance
to free his country from
the chains of its European dictators.

Kev's pencil, which felt like a sword,
in his masterful hand,
gently hovered
over the ballet paper.
He finally spied his chance.

Kev strikes, marking a large X in pencil
over the “Leave” box
and leaves through the side exit,
avoiding the public toilet as he feels
there is no need to wash the blood
from his trembling fingers.

Kevin then leaves the polling station with the understanding
that his vote had saved his “Britain”
from immigration and he has taken
back his country.
Kevin start's to whistle "Rule Britannia” under his breath.
which was not a tune at all
but a altogether annoying high pitch squeal
much to the annoyance of Dogs
and old people with hearing aids
everywhere.

Kevin was your typical Lads "Lad"
with a fully grown “Hipster Beard”and
balding rapidly
which kind of made his head
look like a “Extra Testicle” or the back
of someones Thumb
depending what angle
you were looking at his stupid head.

Kevin hadn't yet realized he was nothing
more then a
freak in a kingdom
of idiots but something was about to change
he could feel it.

Kev had no concept of politics
or anything else for that matter,
and had pretty much been told
what box to tick by his group of mates
who would meet three times a week
down the local conservative club, (and were much older then he)
and would regularly sweat Rohypnol.
which would disguise his
halitosis breath
and gain attention
from the lady's.

yeah...he was that sort of guy.

Striding towards the nearby bus stop
Kev spies a girl sitting on the bus stop bench
crying, beautifully framed between the branches of a swaying tree
and the morning sun
Kev investigates.

"What's the problem darlin? Kev said clenching his buttocks!
sucking in his beer belly
and poking out his “Puny Unit”
so she could see what she was obviously missing.

In a mixture of broken English and Polish
the girl explained that she was upset
that England, a country that she had come to love
would have to leave the European Union
and that she may have to return home
she had just found employment as a Teaching Assistant
and would send money home to her parents so
they could join her in this golden utopia of opportunity.

Kev did not have a clue
what she just said,
but by staring at her mesmerizing eyes
he felt her pity.
Kev would like to feel something else
he thought but seeing as she was upset
would restrain himself from any sexual innuendo
just this once.

The girl was very attractive with shoulder length dark hair
piercing clear eyes,
it was like staring in to a star.
it  was like she was pulsating with cosmic energy
Kev thought, it was a good thought and since having a thought
had never happened to Kev before
today was indeed a day for new experiences.

The girl spoke of Trade disputes and economic crisis
then without warning she put her head on Troy's shoulder
and continued to weep
she told him about her life
what this country means to her
how it had clothed her,
educated her
and how after tomorrow everything would change.

Kev's eyebrows strained as Kev once again
experienced a thought... his third in as many minutes.
Without warning, Kev opened his mouth...
words burst from his throat
like a choir of angels
no one was more surprised then Kev himself.

Kev explained to the girl
that in his folly he had voted leave the EU,
how he didn't understand politics,
and how he thought “Brexit” was a new kind
of breakfast cereal!
It was like she could read his soul?
Kev thought
Had a connection been made?.

He melted in her eyes
feeling the palpitation in his heart
and a tiny erection in his pants.
Was this love?.

The bus speed round the corner
15 minutes late as usual
which meant in some sort of twisted logic
that the bus was on time.

The girl wiped her tears and smiled
it was like bathing in moonlight he thought.
Kev smiled back
" Wait” he said “can I meet you tomorrow?
for a coffee" he said biting his lip
as it was rare for Kev to make contact
with a woman let alone ask her out
for a coffee.

“Meet you here, same time tomorrow?” Kev said
the girl nodded
Kev melted he couldn't believe his luck
" wait" Kev screamed again
“what's your name?”
but it was too late, the girl
had boarded the bus,
sat at the seat of her choice,
placing her left hand at the surface of the window.
The bus began to creep into the distance
as a large rain cloud the size of
England's folly descended overhead.

The next day after boasting to his mates
that he met this “amazing” girl
the time had come at long last.
He waited, and waited,  hours past
but still no girl... whatever her name was?.

That was 6 Months ago
but Kev never forgot the girl.
Sometimes he could see the outline of her smiling face
in the clouds outside his window.
Sometimes in the sun itself.
His mates believed she was a figment of his imagination,
while Kev's parents both stern Socialist's and “Hippy's” to some degree
believed that the girl was
Kev's “Conscience” manifesting itself.

Kev' sat up off his stained ridden sofa
and strolled in the toilet of his grotty
bedsit turning to face the Television
as the news revealed that Britain
has left the EU, aborted all its pensions,
Trade deals being scrapped
Kev figured the girl
would be rounded up
and sent back to Poland
held in a cage
formed from  
cobweb's of the dreams of politicians
never to be seen again.
The love of his life was
gone for good.

Facing his window, he lifts his half drunken can
of Fosters to the smiling idiocy
beneath him and mutters
through clenched teeth
two inaudible words..

“CONGRATULATIONS IDIOT'S”.