Falling out of suspended animation

You want out of suspended animation
But babe, didn’t you know
that’s the only place we thrive?
You want answers to all your questions
But I can’t say what you wanna hear.

So I think…Soon all we’ll be is memories
I don’t regret a thing but
Things will be different once you’re gone.

You’re leaving. On your way out,
You wanted me to do the deed by saying awful things about
How you want to wear the pants such BS
But you know who I am
And you know that don’t fly
And you know that’s some codwollop to bait me

I don’t resent you for hurting me
You fell for me, I don’t know why
You decided we would be together
It was a good enough offer so I stuck around
It was a great offer so I rested my head
You brought me peace Sam
You made me feel held
And there are things I fear I can’t have again but
It’s okay you know, it’s what it is
I will have what I have moving forward, remain myself
Reach for what I want
Tell them what I want
Get it, get it again
Look into somebody’s eyes as I climax and feel a peace that was one percentage point off
With you

But Oh how the air was heavy that we both breathed
Oh how the space was thick that we inhabited
How our hearts pumped and melded in the glow of what we created
Oh how you rocked me inside out
My world, my body, my soul,
Oh how you let yourself in
And I obliged
Oh how I want to hug you and squeeze you and press up against you
Feel you heavy on me
Smooth and heavy on me

But you betrayed me
You crossed a line
Proved that you’re just another guy
Part of the forces against me and not with
Carrying the weight of thousands of years
Of gendered dehumanization, violence, oppression
You were mine and I was yours
But you didn’t understand what I was really about
You thought I could just give it up and become a psychiatrist
Proving you have no concept
Of what makes me tick

We had a good run
as suspense in mid-air goes
we ran in the wind, going nowhere,
but you are not for me nor I for you
you gotta clean up your mind of its backward orientation
I thought you were better
I want you to be better
But if you get better it's no longer for me.