She who must be obeyed

 Quick reactions, sharp of wit
Despite her age she takes no shit

Long grey locks of flowing hair
Still could crush you like a bear

Craggy face, full of wrinkles
When she’s drunk her good eye twinkles

Rosy cheeks and rosy nose
telling lies, you nose, it grows

She’s got a man’s moustache and beard
When she shaves it reappears

Smelling sweetly of lavender and piss
Why does she always wants a kiss

She’s got arms like Popeye has
She fills the room by farting gas

She drinks whisky, she drinks beer
Curses like a sailor for all to hear

If noisily you loiter, or if you linger
She’ll shout “fuck off!” and give you the finger

She is definitely different, like no other
But she is surely my beloved grandmother