deepundergroundpoetry.com
Nicotine Lipstick
I can't stop
A part of me knows that, but I
convince myself I can
if I wanted to.
I just don't want to.
I exhale.
If I close my eyes
I can almost imagine--
I am not breathing out smoke
My mouth is not lined with poison
I am not destroying myself.
I am.
It is.
That is exactly what I'm doing.
And I don't even like it.
But I keep going,
right up to the filter
sometimes past it
until my fingers burn
until it nearly feels like
I am breathing in fire.
It disgusts me.
Makes me sick.
It's sweet, so sweet
then so bitter my stomach clenches.
...and then I come back for seconds.
It clings to my lips.
Lingers.
I guess
this is me
kissing Death on the mouth.
One day, Death is going to kiss back.
A part of me knows that, but I
convince myself I can
if I wanted to.
I just don't want to.
I exhale.
If I close my eyes
I can almost imagine--
I am not breathing out smoke
My mouth is not lined with poison
I am not destroying myself.
I am.
It is.
That is exactly what I'm doing.
And I don't even like it.
But I keep going,
right up to the filter
sometimes past it
until my fingers burn
until it nearly feels like
I am breathing in fire.
It disgusts me.
Makes me sick.
It's sweet, so sweet
then so bitter my stomach clenches.
...and then I come back for seconds.
It clings to my lips.
Lingers.
I guess
this is me
kissing Death on the mouth.
One day, Death is going to kiss back.
Published 21st Mar 2016
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21st Mar 2016 5:39pm
24th Mar 2016 11:50am
3rd Apr 2016 10:53am
Yea, unfortunately you're exactly right. I hate the thought of someone
smokin cigarettes... My dad was a chain smoker, talked shit all the time when others tried to warn him
to stop. He never listened, developed throat cancer, n caused our whole family to watch as he died a slow, agonizing death.
smokin cigarettes... My dad was a chain smoker, talked shit all the time when others tried to warn him
to stop. He never listened, developed throat cancer, n caused our whole family to watch as he died a slow, agonizing death.
