Eternal Essence

I pay for hookers
Emotional attachment is not affordable
Whats love? And its relationship with feelings of inferiority and unworthiness?
Emotions preventing me from making calculated moves like chess
Is it just that my mind playing tricks on me?
No more exploiting me, fuck a friendship if we don’t have sex you cant hang with me
I am aware that I am chasing an illusion , sex is not satisfying only increasing my confusion
Only life time that I am losing
Fuck society, your are doctors, lawyers and employees but I am a different entity
I am me and I refuse to trade money for dignity
I be me see me being me love me hate me I am connected to the eternal essence-divinity
I have to take care of my responsibility, life is what I make it
I have to learn emotional mastery, and I make it
Determination, Discipline, Hard Work and Perserverance
Whats love? I will be patient and Faithful maybe I find the answer in her appearance
Now I get it ! love is relating towards yourself internally embrace yourself: acceptance, tolerance appreciation
Stop looking externally for admiration
But I got no worries anymore as I trust in God
I only have one job
Which is to work on the talents I have been blessed with
I refuse to quit on myself
I decided by myself to quit quitting on myself