deepundergroundpoetry.com
Dear whoever is reading this…
What would you have had me do?
Tame my demons?
Keep them on a leash?
I’ve always craved affection,
for attention and love,
but it did nothing but leave marks on my arms full of madness and blood.
What everyone didn’t know was that,
I died inside so long before,
I’ve wondered even the darkest alleys of my shallow heart at night,
searching,
searching for a glimpse of light;
worry not I’ll walk the aisle alone,
with a bouquet of salt-tasting lilies,
all will be well.
Please hold back those tears,
see,
this is the only way.
This is my only way out; out of this darkness and despair.
God abandoned my prayers a long time ago.
I’ve carried my burden,
my shame,
my hate,
all across my wrist for too long.
At this moment my notions are clear,
all my sins and sorrows are gushing warmly from my wrists.
It was never anyone’s fault but mine, so worry not;
I’m fixing it.
I cross my hands on my heart and hope to die.
Goodbye.
Yours Sincerely
At peace.
Tame my demons?
Keep them on a leash?
I’ve always craved affection,
for attention and love,
but it did nothing but leave marks on my arms full of madness and blood.
What everyone didn’t know was that,
I died inside so long before,
I’ve wondered even the darkest alleys of my shallow heart at night,
searching,
searching for a glimpse of light;
worry not I’ll walk the aisle alone,
with a bouquet of salt-tasting lilies,
all will be well.
Please hold back those tears,
see,
this is the only way.
This is my only way out; out of this darkness and despair.
God abandoned my prayers a long time ago.
I’ve carried my burden,
my shame,
my hate,
all across my wrist for too long.
At this moment my notions are clear,
all my sins and sorrows are gushing warmly from my wrists.
It was never anyone’s fault but mine, so worry not;
I’m fixing it.
I cross my hands on my heart and hope to die.
Goodbye.
Yours Sincerely
At peace.
Published 10th Oct 2015
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10th Oct 2015 6:32pm
Masango,
Having walked down the road of wanting to die a number of times, I understand how you feel. Somehow I lived to be an old man and have nothing going on in my life to make it worth living. Yet still I am alive 32 years after the first time I decided to die. The only advice I have is to not burden the world with your choice. I'm on the other side of the world and I don't have wings to fly there and save you. Am I supposed to carry your sorrow on for you after you are gone? I have my own sorrow that has burdened me for far too long. You won't find peace in suicide. It will just continue he Hell you can't stand on for eternity. Once you are there, you can't kill yourself out of Hell. Choose another way. If you can't lift yourself out of despair, find someone who is trained to help you. If I knew how to make misery go away, I would have sent my own sorrow packing 30 years ago. But here I am, lonely and depressed with no one who gives a damn. Make something of the life you have and do the best you can...
Having walked down the road of wanting to die a number of times, I understand how you feel. Somehow I lived to be an old man and have nothing going on in my life to make it worth living. Yet still I am alive 32 years after the first time I decided to die. The only advice I have is to not burden the world with your choice. I'm on the other side of the world and I don't have wings to fly there and save you. Am I supposed to carry your sorrow on for you after you are gone? I have my own sorrow that has burdened me for far too long. You won't find peace in suicide. It will just continue he Hell you can't stand on for eternity. Once you are there, you can't kill yourself out of Hell. Choose another way. If you can't lift yourself out of despair, find someone who is trained to help you. If I knew how to make misery go away, I would have sent my own sorrow packing 30 years ago. But here I am, lonely and depressed with no one who gives a damn. Make something of the life you have and do the best you can...
10th Oct 2015 11:31pm
10th Oct 2015 10:46pm
~** <3 **~ With all due respect.... I personally feel it's not suicide you seek my friend. But a F'' escape to cure or heal the mental pain your feeling. Your misunderstood, there's nothing wrong with you. I tried cutting as a child, not to kill myself... but.... I summoned a pleasure I didn't understand at the time!!!!! And that was curing the mental pain I was going through. I wanted the pain to go away without killing myself. Cutting has been a cure for me not a suicide attempt. But.... it could lead to accidental suicide to us and to the Foreiner's report suicide!!! Not fair right???? I feel your pain, and remember... Your Not Alone... even though it may seem that way. ~** <3 **~ Lushviliance Veins
