My Biggest Mistake

I've never been so ashamed of myself, the day I decided to say no to new life was the day I decided not to have an opinion. I followed his lead like he loved me deeply but I soon realized that was a lie like every other thing he ever told me.

In love with a big family is still my dream, though I know I will always be one short. How can I live with that? Well I did, though it still pains me to pen it.

"I will always be here for you" he said disgustingly after the event with a light smirk on his face which I believed to be his way of assuring me all would be okay.

Two months later he needed a break, the trauma he said was too much for him, but a little birdie told me the night of the event he was spotted partying all night. What am I supposed to do? Move on! How easy for you to say with your perfect life, your never been outside life.

I might be strong, but how strong can I really be when I have a heart made of gold?

I feel taken advantage of
Sigh!
Out the window I look in despair
Oh time please come rescue me
I'm tired of feeling this way,
Save me from myself, my mind.
Save me from my mistake.
My regret.