19 Years  

You used to dread him coming home
on a Saturday night
after the two pints,  
which were really six.  
Having something to eat
before taking you upstairs in the dark.
For a rough grope of your breasts,  
perfunctory kisses
then laying you on your back,  
aggressively pulling up your nightgown
roughly opening your legs
exposing your cunt  
sticking his rough fingers
deep inside your dry cunt  
sufficient to make him erect
It hurt a lot  
He ignored your body tensing up
He wanted to fuck you  
That was his right  
Whenever he desired
He was brutal and overpowering  
You could not stop him  
So you lay there and let it happen
Night after night  
Week after week  
Month after month
For nineteen fucking years
He just quickly fucked you
in the missionary position
saying insincere words
smelling of smoke and ale
The sex was urgent and hurried
He thankfully came quickly  
but for you it never quickly enough,  
he could not care if he hurt you
during sex he wanted his rights
and you were there to give it to him.  
When he rolled off you
and turned his back to you  
before falling asleep  
you felt relief that the ordeal was over  
for another night at least
Sex was non negotiable
Period or no period   
Sex happened when he wanted it
at night after the pub  
and you like a dutiful wife
never refused him.
In bed he scared you
He overpowered you
That was the bed you made
When you married in haste
He never asked what you wanted
He made no effort to pleasure you
He just followed the same routine  
For nineteen fucking years
he thankfully never came twice
you sadly never came once
you hated sex
He was your first man
Your only experience
You could never talk about it
You thought all women endured this  
Then the bastard had an affair
So you left him
  
Thinking back
did you ever initiate sex
throughout the whole of the marriage,  
were you rejected,  
do you think he was selfish?