BABYSITTER

 I said I wasn't a baby
she said she knows
I'm a grown up girl
And we can play a little game

she likes to play
sit in that chair
You're not scared are you?
babies feel scared

not you
I sit in the chair it was black and comfy
too big for me
had wheels to spin me round and round

She disappeared for only a moment
I spun around all dizzy and excited
What's that? I say
duct tape

sit still
I do
I'm not scared
the sound it makes as she pulls it out

I laugh at her
She says sit still
I do as she wraps it around and around
my arms and legs

I'm still laughing this is so much fun
she's such a cool babysitter
She smiles wide and says close your mouth
I do

the tape is cool and tight 
now I can't even laugh
she steps back and likes what she sees
then she pushes the chair round and round

It's all fun until she doesn't stop
I feel sick and need to close my eyes
she stops it suddenly and the room dances around me
I try telling her to let me go

but nothing comes out
She doesn't look at me
as she grabs her cigarettes and leaves
I hear the door click as it locks

I'm all alone
trapped to this chair
I wait  
 I wait

The tears start to pour
my nose is running 
blending with the tears
My face is hot and itchy where I can't scratch

After what felt like forever
she comes back
she says I thought you weren't scared
We were just having fun

She unwraps the tape and lets me take it off my lips
I wipe at my wet face, trembling
It was just fun she says
nothing wrong

Stop crying and never tell your mom
I run out the door 
I run for hours
I come home with bleeding knees and dirty clothes

I never tell