deepundergroundpoetry.com
Ceramic
Born in the flames,
brought up in the rain.
You ceramic structure,
you can not be a friend.
Wait for the dusk
the horror to subside
this, fellow shadow,
will be your last ride.
As the distant flames shine upon you,
i'll see your shadows getting spent,
you're hard but brittle,you ceramic structure.
No you can not be a friend
brought up in the rain.
You ceramic structure,
you can not be a friend.
Wait for the dusk
the horror to subside
this, fellow shadow,
will be your last ride.
As the distant flames shine upon you,
i'll see your shadows getting spent,
you're hard but brittle,you ceramic structure.
No you can not be a friend
Published 21st May 2011
| Edited 7th Jul 2011
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5th Jul 2011 5:21pm
I read this 3 times and although it needs some work I really like the idea of the fragility of ceramics not being conducive to a friendship. Misspelled "brought" in second line. Don't know about the horror, etc. but the fragile friendship theme that could be expanded./fly
7th Jul 2011 6:17pm
thanks for the feedback...spelling has been corrected...also i would like to mention the inspiration behind the poem to be the earthen pot which is used in Hindu mythology to temporarily store the ashes of the deceased...that might help your better understanding of the poem...
10th Jul 2011 9:41pm
