A Fool In The Cuckoo's Nest

It’s been a month since you put me here
And still I have not spoken
Sometimes I will smile and nod
Most of the time I sit and stare
It’s not worth the effort to interact
I know things will never change
My roommate is an elf who sings to me
Future stories set in the past
He’s beyond help
Maybe we both are

My life has always been a puzzle
And I’ve walked on the bits and pieces
Like ice chips in an arctic sea
Maybe it could have been different if only
You had taken time to put me together
But you ran from me like everyone else
Little knowing that when you did
I would let go of the thread that tied me to this world
And lose myself in the past
I can’t blame you for leaving
I drive everyone away eventually
I only wish you gave me reasons
To comfort me in my numbness

It  is still autumn outside my window
And today the rain is washing shiny patterns
On the red-gold leaves
I have them convinced I’m not dangerous
To myself or others
So tonight when they bring me my meal
I will hide my knife in the folds of my clothes

Later I will select a vulnerable spot to cut
I will watch myself seep into the ground
Until the stars go black
And then
If all goes well
They will bury me beneath the golden oak
And the rain will wash me clean
At last

-Zoe Richardson