Love with Abandon

So this was how it became  
Another chapter of my pain  
Mundane and lifeless  
Our mouths no longer moved half moon  
when we looked at each other and  
our lips no longer spoke of anything  
but a closed door  
We had begun to despise one another  
Passionate fights arose and deep thorns were exposed   
Still through the worst I don't know what kept us together  
What I will forever miss is   
the small moments that I no longer notice  
Driving in the car when your fingers  
stroked through my hair or  
the first time we danced  
I was shy around you but I didn't care  
We would stay up late and talk  
Drinking and smoking the night into dawn  
When the silence came around we were so peaceful as one  
I felt close to you in a way that I never knew existed  
If I could relive one more of those good days  
I would tell you I love you before it was too late  
I spent so many years in wait just for a reaper to collect my fate  
My wound split open wide from all the secrets I had slept  
Blood was rushing to the surface and   
in the last few moments before I died  
Finding the truth made me nervous  
This love that had bound me 
was now with a single divide  
Quietly solemn, I was dead inside  
Though my soul was finally on the horizon   
From harboring all of your lies