Walls

I felt trapped within those walls.
I felt I would never leave at all.
 
I felt a prisoner in my family home.
Oh how I wished to freely roam.
 
I didn't believe I would ever leave.
I felt locked away in that house would you believe.
 
He always found me with a face of gloom.
Desperately had to escape my room.
 
Blood was spilt
Pain was built.
Hope would wilt.
He had no guilt.
 
He lived in anger.
He took in anger.
He savaged in anger.
He was anger.
 
He whispered in my darkness, "I love you..."
 
Many walls around me.
Closing in, no chance to flee.
 
I believed it was too late.
I believed sealed was my fate.
 
Who could help me when nothing could be said?
So my existence continued with dread.
 
He tried to kill my spirit dead.
But I was not yet bled.
 
One day anger met anger.
For a moment I was without languor.
 
Then the sword of rage was thrust in to the hilt.
And like a flower in the midday sun I did wilt.
 
I was an innocent child with a broken spirit.
I was an angry teenager with a broken spirit.
I became a forlorn adult with a broken spirit.
 
My parole finally came with the help of another.
Two women became my father and my mother.
 
I was born again at forty-one and had to grow up on the run.
Much learning I had to do and I had only just begun.
 
I feel like a child with much to learn still.
As I climb life's humongous hill.
 
Help to live a life I have support around.
But my spirit is still broken and cast down.
 
"Get out of my dreams" I yell each morning.
Both are long gone and not a day was lost in mourning.
 
Don't tell me it is possible to start my life again.
Through the pores of my skin depression and despair I obtain.
 
What chance did I have with the parents I had?
All I wanted was a loving mum and dad.
 
I feel trapped within these walls.
I fell...I will never get to leave at all.