Contentment

It's a simple victory really
It's a joyous moment when you for once don't taste defeat
Back into the normal simplicities of life
Work
School
Homework
Mental breakdown
Sleep
And repeat.
Yet while wandering aimlessly I saw you
You who will not be named, not anymore for you don't deserve to be
All this time I imagined running up to you
Babbling mindlessly about things that didn't really matter
I wondered what we would talk about, what we would do together
I wondered what forever would feel like
But the funny thing is
Once I saw you, I didn't get excited
There was no butterflies fluttering trying to break free from my abdominal
There was no happiness, there was no joy
For you killed all of those precious things long ago

Instead of going up to you and letting my presence be known
I quickened my pace to get away, for I am done dealing with your endless mind games
It's a bittersweet time
For as my life is continuing yours seems to be ending (from what you ever so graciously informed me of)
I do not wish you ill will, despite the fact I have every right to
I do not wish you pain, or misery
I wish you a simple life
One that I am no longer apart of
I'd like to thank you actually
Destroying me forced me to find myself, for I didn't know how lost I was
I'll never be okay, but I am better than I was before
I'd really like to thank you
Because of you
I am now free