Unanswered Questions Remain

     ~Unanswered Questions Remains~
Frustration, anger, & depression
These days,
that is all what she is feeling.
Sitting in the dark writing poetry & thinking what her plan is
Blood shot red eyes, with tears about to come streaming out of her eyes
Tired because of all the lies
Want to give up but then she looks & realized how far she made it
Making it through life seems to be her only motivation
She feels as if the people who claim they love her is only using her
Blood maybe thicker than water
But nowadays ya own family members would even hurt ya
Claim they don't know what they would do without her
But doesn't even understand her own daughter & turn around to slap her....
No one else will understand her
Is there someone out there who will actually help her?
Is there someone out there who actually understand her?
So many thoughts running through her mind,
Feels like she don't even understand herself
People don't realize how much they hurt her
She maybe smiling on the outside ...
But truly broken on the inside
Fighting the urge to cut herself because it seems like it would be the solution
But afraid it will cause a big altercation,
And cause a bigger problem for her to handle
Each day, she seeks happiness in life but each time she gets it...
She lose it...
Will she ever find it again?
Still AGAIN these unanswered questions remain in her head.
She thinking about suicide inside of her head,
but wondering if God is testing her again?
Tired of the negativity,
Wishing for the positivity...
Realizing the only person which understands her is herself & nobody else.
Only way for herself to reach her goals is by motivating herself
Still trying to survive,
Still have second thoughts & asking herself is it her life even worth living?
Still these questions are constantly drilling deeply inside of her head...
They may remain unanswered.
Who knows?
Just hoping she may make it ....
Someday.
-Mani Blue