Confused

I like to write/ but don’t do it for the like/  
lost the ability to see wrong from right/  
caused the hostility I feel toward life/  
furious, fumblin’ through the night/  
curious, will I ever find the light/  
clouds in sight/ feel outright contrite/  
couldn't care critics claim my words incite/  
darkness approaches my mind to benight/  
   
never took time to think it through/    
lost hope/I took a toke/    
took a turn for the worse/  
saw my dreams burn and burst/    
like a fiend’s thirst/    
friends and family first/  
what makes you smile also hurts/  
   
hold my head high/
heal my heart/ through these rhymes/
these lines/ take me through them tougher times/  
this writin’ is my therapy/    
the devil is my enemy/  
been through hate and jealousy/  
heed the advice of the elderly/  
the seed will rise a king to be/