deepundergroundpoetry.com
Seclusion
Trust? Me? Perish the thought!
I tried that once, dirts all I got.
Peace? Me? Nowhere to be found!
Fear, pain, sorrow, are all that abound.
Love? Me? No one would dare!
They all flee from me, not one left to care.
Hope? Me? What is the use?
All that it leaves is internal abuse.
No matter the struggle, I remain obtuse.
All that's left for me, is to remain a recluse.
I tried that once, dirts all I got.
Peace? Me? Nowhere to be found!
Fear, pain, sorrow, are all that abound.
Love? Me? No one would dare!
They all flee from me, not one left to care.
Hope? Me? What is the use?
All that it leaves is internal abuse.
No matter the struggle, I remain obtuse.
All that's left for me, is to remain a recluse.
Published 14th May 2014
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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The author encourages honest critique.
15th May 2014 2:58am
Good write. I like the structure and the edginess. Again, I'm not too big on rhyme schemes. But, I do not think it limited you. If it did, it was not as noticeable as your first piece.
As for the message, hang in there buddy. Don't give up on you, and do not make a new one.
As for the message, hang in there buddy. Don't give up on you, and do not make a new one.
Thanks for the input once again! I have tried branching out a bit since we last spoke by straying from the rhyme scheme in a couple of poems that I have wrote recently, but I haven't gotten it down enough to be willing to post any of them online.
As for the message, much of what I write is a reflection of the state of mind that I have had in different times of my life. A couple of years ago I was going through depression, had no friends, and just all around hated life. Since then my mental and social state has much improved and I have an abundance of close friends and am loving life. Thanks for the encouragement!
As for the message, much of what I write is a reflection of the state of mind that I have had in different times of my life. A couple of years ago I was going through depression, had no friends, and just all around hated life. Since then my mental and social state has much improved and I have an abundance of close friends and am loving life. Thanks for the encouragement!
15th May 2014 4:21am
No problem. You should probably post them. Hopefully you'll get critic on them to guide you.
21st Apr 2015 7:47am
Totally know this feeling! Been there before, sometimes we just get sick of people and connection.
