I lied

    
I told him that I love him, but that was a lie.  
   
My throat was on fire, caught in between his mouth 
and his tongue-slides; lapping, licking, sucking.
I screamed it, alright!? But I didn't mean to. 
Maybe I do, but now I'm not sure. rip, rip, rip
My clothes all fell, my back felt cold against 
the wall. Then all I can remember was that push,
or was it the pull that made me lose it?
I don't know, it happened too fast. 
But I liked it, in fact I loved it. Maybe that 
what love is. Surrender. But then again, I'm not
really sure, I blanked out and I screamed it
again and again and again then I wrapped both
of my legs around him then he pushed and pushed
and pushed, until that's all what I know
and forgot who I was, but only for a while.
Now, thinking about it alone in our bed, 
I'm still not sure. Because
after that, we fought then he left and I cried
and thought about love, lies, love, lies,
love, lies... Love 
and his goddamm lies!  But still,

I love him... No, that was a lie.