deepundergroundpoetry.com
The science of pain, the sentience of anger and the feeling of loss.
Pain comes in two phases...
The first phase is mediated by the fast-conducting Aδ fibers and the second part due to (Polymodal) C fibers. The pain associated with the Aδ fibers can be associated to an initial extremely sharp pain. The second phase is a more prolonged and slightly less intense feeling of pain as a result of the damage. If there is massive or prolonged input to a C fiber, there is a progressive build up in the spinal cord dorsal horn; this phenomenon is similar to tetanus in muscles but is called wind-up. If wind-up occurs there is a probability of increased sensitivity to pain.
In mammals, nociceptors are sensory neurons that are found in any area of the body that can sense pain either externally or internally.A nociceptor is a sensory neuron (nerve cell) that responds to potentially damaging stimuli by sending nerve signals to the spinal cord and brain. This process, called nociception, usually causes the perception of pain. Nociceptors, respond only to noxious, high intensity stimuli. At the peripheral end of the nociceptor, noxious stimuli are transduced into currents that, above a given threshold, begin to generate action potentials that travel along the nerve fiber to the spinal cord. The "specificity" (whether it responds to thermal, chemical or mechanical features of its environment) of a nociceptor is determined by which ion channels it expresses at its peripheral end. Dozens of nociceptor transient receptor potential, acid sensing, potassium and ligand-gated ion channels have so far been identified, and their exact functions are still being determined.
At first, you deny it. The act of denial makes you more conscious because if you're asked to think about an orange apple you wouldn't think of a red orange..or would you? Then comes that sinking feeling. We've all felt it. It's not debilitating but it's there. The sky is not so blue anymore, the sunshine not bright enough. But you move on, life goes on. Shit happens. That's what you say to yourself whilst spinning the cocoon that you hope would keep you from harm, keep you safe. A hardened chrysalis without any desire or hope to metamorphose. life goes on. You hope. It does. Life does go on....work...commitments....but wait...what's that nagging sensation? "Maybe I should get some coffee". After all "We're all productive good people". Denizens of a dysfunctional Utopian age. It's still there, it's aching, it's throbbing..It is fucking irritating! "Fuck off!" is what you say, you know not to whom. It could have been God if you weren't an atheist. Too bad. Then comes unbridled anger.
An interrogation within your head. Questions and questions and questions, with doubts as hints and excuses for answers, fueling a fire that scorches your soul. But you never believed you had one. Pent up wrath, crystallized to perfection, all facets reflecting a single image - Ego. "Why me? How could they? What did I do to deserve this? I did what I had to! I was ignored. I was suffering". "If only...I could have...I should have". "Please make it stop". With each statement be it a question or an answer you unfold, unto yourself. Pain oozing out from the bleeding paper-cuts from an imperfect origami you've created, tearing you up. "STOP" that's what you say to yourself and pretend to move on. Well, pretending doesn't quite work when you know you're pretending. The unpleasantness wouldn't go away. Maybe it's time for some medication, "gotta stay up and going". "Gotta..stay up." you lie. It is still there and getting worse. Maybe booze? Something else? After all what could break a broken being? "I jus' wanna feel good, wanna stay outta reach & high". "Gotta keep going, right? That's what they taught me, right?".
No matter what it takes?
And it takes a lot. For now, you are talking to me admiring the silent audience of the walls.
Time flows by. You want it to. It does. Tick-tock-tick-tock... And suddenly, without any warning, it descends, crashing upon you. "What? WHY?". Who pulled the trigger? Or was there a timer you failed to diffuse? You can't think, it doesn't make sense. It doesn't make sense!! Why bother making sense?. You can't breathe, no amount of air is enough to puff it away. There is nowhere to run. The cocoon has been breached and here it comes. The flood. Unstoppable, undeniable, ravaging you, drowning you. No. Help wouldn't help. You don't want to be helped. You don't care. "Let it fucking happen". And it happens. The butterfly enclosed within the cocoon wants to fly. Spread it's wings and taste the sky. And you let it. You can't cry, tears aren't enough. You can't scream and shout, they're not loud enough. You don't wanna talk about it. What would they know? You don't wanna listen. What can they say that you already not know? Nothing! Only you know pain. Loss. Suffering. You are the God of your reality, and only YOU know! Only WE know! Only I know.. And there it is, a flawed perfection unintended, a beautiful red butterfly, fluttering about under the sky so blue, sunshine so bright.
Pain comes in two phases...
The first phase is mediated by the fast-conducting Aδ fibers and the second part due to (Polymodal) C fibers. The pain associated with the Aδ fibers can be associated to an initial extremely sharp pain. The second phase is a more prolonged and slightly less intense feeling of pain as a result of the damage. If there is massive or prolonged input to a C fiber, there is a progressive build up in the spinal cord dorsal horn; this phenomenon is similar to tetanus in muscles but is called wind-up. If wind-up occurs there is a probability of increased sensitivity to pain.
In mammals, nociceptors are sensory neurons that are found in any area of the body that can sense pain either externally or internally.A nociceptor is a sensory neuron (nerve cell) that responds to potentially damaging stimuli by sending nerve signals to the spinal cord and brain. This process, called nociception, usually causes the perception of pain. Nociceptors, respond only to noxious, high intensity stimuli. At the peripheral end of the nociceptor, noxious stimuli are transduced into currents that, above a given threshold, begin to generate action potentials that travel along the nerve fiber to the spinal cord. The "specificity" (whether it responds to thermal, chemical or mechanical features of its environment) of a nociceptor is determined by which ion channels it expresses at its peripheral end. Dozens of nociceptor transient receptor potential, acid sensing, potassium and ligand-gated ion channels have so far been identified, and their exact functions are still being determined.
At first, you deny it. The act of denial makes you more conscious because if you're asked to think about an orange apple you wouldn't think of a red orange..or would you? Then comes that sinking feeling. We've all felt it. It's not debilitating but it's there. The sky is not so blue anymore, the sunshine not bright enough. But you move on, life goes on. Shit happens. That's what you say to yourself whilst spinning the cocoon that you hope would keep you from harm, keep you safe. A hardened chrysalis without any desire or hope to metamorphose. life goes on. You hope. It does. Life does go on....work...commitments....but wait...what's that nagging sensation? "Maybe I should get some coffee". After all "We're all productive good people". Denizens of a dysfunctional Utopian age. It's still there, it's aching, it's throbbing..It is fucking irritating! "Fuck off!" is what you say, you know not to whom. It could have been God if you weren't an atheist. Too bad. Then comes unbridled anger.
An interrogation within your head. Questions and questions and questions, with doubts as hints and excuses for answers, fueling a fire that scorches your soul. But you never believed you had one. Pent up wrath, crystallized to perfection, all facets reflecting a single image - Ego. "Why me? How could they? What did I do to deserve this? I did what I had to! I was ignored. I was suffering". "If only...I could have...I should have". "Please make it stop". With each statement be it a question or an answer you unfold, unto yourself. Pain oozing out from the bleeding paper-cuts from an imperfect origami you've created, tearing you up. "STOP" that's what you say to yourself and pretend to move on. Well, pretending doesn't quite work when you know you're pretending. The unpleasantness wouldn't go away. Maybe it's time for some medication, "gotta stay up and going". "Gotta..stay up." you lie. It is still there and getting worse. Maybe booze? Something else? After all what could break a broken being? "I jus' wanna feel good, wanna stay outta reach & high". "Gotta keep going, right? That's what they taught me, right?".
No matter what it takes?
And it takes a lot. For now, you are talking to me admiring the silent audience of the walls.
Time flows by. You want it to. It does. Tick-tock-tick-tock... And suddenly, without any warning, it descends, crashing upon you. "What? WHY?". Who pulled the trigger? Or was there a timer you failed to diffuse? You can't think, it doesn't make sense. It doesn't make sense!! Why bother making sense?. You can't breathe, no amount of air is enough to puff it away. There is nowhere to run. The cocoon has been breached and here it comes. The flood. Unstoppable, undeniable, ravaging you, drowning you. No. Help wouldn't help. You don't want to be helped. You don't care. "Let it fucking happen". And it happens. The butterfly enclosed within the cocoon wants to fly. Spread it's wings and taste the sky. And you let it. You can't cry, tears aren't enough. You can't scream and shout, they're not loud enough. You don't wanna talk about it. What would they know? You don't wanna listen. What can they say that you already not know? Nothing! Only you know pain. Loss. Suffering. You are the God of your reality, and only YOU know! Only WE know! Only I know.. And there it is, a flawed perfection unintended, a beautiful red butterfly, fluttering about under the sky so blue, sunshine so bright.
Pain comes in two phases...
Published 19th Mar 2014
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