Before Newton

Before Newton discovered gravity
In those long ago days of depravity
Did we screw in the trees
Just like chimpanzees?
And how did we go to the lavatory?

Did we glide above streets?
Hold onto bed sheets
Lest they floated away in the night
And leave us to quiver wake up with a shiver
Somehow that doesn't seem right

It’s a mystery to me
That pre-gravity
People managed still to make love
Were Nora and Fred tied to the bed
To stop themselves rising above?

A very strange feeling sex on the ceiling
Candelabrum stuck under yer arse
It’s a wonder that passion
Didn't go out of fashion
And humanity end in pure farce

But our Isaac had class
And we should raise a glass
His discovery put everything right
We now get around with our feet on the ground
And it’s easy to bonk in long grass